You Know Who I’m Not Crazy About? Nancy Grace.

06 Jul

And it’s not just because she sounds like a drunken, uneducated hillbilly – that would in fact probably be a good thing as far as I’m concerned.  I love hanging out with drunken hillbillies – I frequently am a drunken hillbilly.  And I’m not particularly well-educated, either, and being educated doesn’t mean I’m going to be crazy about you anyway.  Lots of people keep their degrees right up their butts, don’t they?

The main reason I don’t like Nancy Grace is she’s on a news channel and she’s presented like someone who is bringing you some hard-hitting news commentary, perhaps in accordance to some sort of dim level of journalistic integrity.  Presenting facts. I mean, if you ask CNN if Nancy Grace is about equivalent to a supermarket tabloid circa 1985, they’ll say, “No.”

Isn’t that amazing?

I don’t think news is supposed to yell at me or say”bullshit” while snapping its fingers. I don’t think legal news commentary ought to sound like a rural bar at one o’clock in the morning. 

Ah, yes but she can do it and you can like it and we can disagree about whether it’s news or commentary or a bunch of crazy, knee-jerk bullshit getting blasted at us through a psychic flamethrower. 

I mean, sure.  Opinions and assholes.  My apologies if you like to dissect court cases or if you think that makes you a juror or if you really dig Nancy Grace, or whatever.  All I’m saying is, I’m not crazy about her. 

The thing is, she loves to talk about court cases, but then she wants to do it emotionally.  Like it matters at all if we all know O.J. did it.  The court case is about proving it.  The prosecution has to prove it, and the jury has reach a defined determination about whether or not they’ve done that. 

The outside perspective that she screams through a megaphone is again, her right as an American citizen.  Have at it.  But it’s also very literally irrelevant and counterproductive to the court case.  It doesn’t matter if Nancy Grace declares something Bee Ess!  What matters is if it was legally proven in a court of law that it was Bee Ess.  It either was or it wasn’t.

This outside perspective is so clearly irrelevant to the process that our system requires us to shield the jurors from the exact irresponsible speculation that Nancy Grace loves to scream from the rooftops.  She pollutes the process, and she does it like a drunken, uneducated hillbilly.  Which again, I’ll take that at a barbecue or a pool hall any day.  My legal commentary?  Not so much.

Nancy Grace is poisoning the Earth with her astoundingly simplistic stupidity, pumping it directly into the culture through a pipeline of our basic fears and frustrations.  And she’s doing it on purpose, and she’s doing it because we’re watching her, and I think we should all probably stop.  We’re feeding a Lovecraftian monster from another realm. 

Basically, this woman is farting into the mouth of America, and no, it won’t kill us. But she’s sort of cackling maniacally while she does it, and yes, I dislike her for it.  I dislike her on a deep and personal level.  Call me crazy.



Posted by on July 6, 2011 in Uncategorized


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7 responses to “You Know Who I’m Not Crazy About? Nancy Grace.

  1. Robert Scott Lawrence

    July 7, 2011 at 12:14 am

    Plus one.

    My wife loves Nancy Grace, but after a day at the office arguing with opposing counsel the last thing I can stomach is an ugly-voiced talking head spouting biased opinion that doesn’t even make an attempt at objectivity. While I admire a good ad hominem argument as much as the next guy, the American public really doesn’t need another pundit spewing crazy talk disguised as reasoned opinion.

    If she would start off the show by saying “I am biased and believe everyone accused of a crime is guilty and should rot in prison forever” — sort of like an advertising disclaimer — I would be inclined to cut her some slack. But she doesn’t. So I don’t.

    Glad to see you back.

  2. ecossie possie

    July 8, 2011 at 1:28 am

    Well I dont have to watch Nancy Grace as I live in UK .However seen quite a few clips of her as I followed the soap opra of the scamthonys after there daughter murdered there grandchild CAYLEE,,Or as they called her that little girl..Australia got Nancy Grace nailed on when they done a play called Tot Mom showed her as the screaming harridian that she is.Nancy Grace was a crooked attorney whom was sanctioned twice by the bar ,She is a liar an a hype merchant,She screams out BOMBSHELL to indicate some explosive new story…However a bombshell is like a spent bullet case an the only part of a bomb that does not explode.

  3. ecossie possie

    July 16, 2011 at 3:27 pm

    Waaaaaaaaaaaasup? No one commenting on your rare scarce an should be treasured blogs? You arent even commenting on your lack of comments? Is this some sort of experiment?You went for a blog every day for a year .I have some astounding news as well but I dont think I will share it even though it is mind boggling an magical news that would be exclusive to this blog,,,,,,,,Oh all right I will spill the beans as it will remain secret anyway as no one seems to be paying attention not even YOU….Pink Floyd heard of them? Garry Gillmore heard of him ? Thought so .But bet you didnt know he was Harry Potters Father did you?….Oh you want proof….Very well I shall return with proof as long as you keep this BOMBSHELL To yourself an dont tell Nancy Grace…

  4. ecossie possie

    July 16, 2011 at 3:40 pm

    So did you spot the deliberate mistake? YES well done Gary Gillmore was of course a murdering mormon whom demanded to be put to death because he didnt have the guts to kill himsef.Had no problem killing other people though,Norman Mailer wrote an excellent book about the prick called the executeners song.There was also a song wrritten about him by a PUNK ROCK BAND CALLED, …LOOKING THROUGH THE EYES OF GARRY GILLMORE…..Now back to the bombshell news that none but us shall ever know .Pink Floyds David Gillmour is Harry Potters Father keep it on the downlow

    • Tom Chalfant

      July 19, 2011 at 7:02 am

      Gary Gilmour was the last man in America to be put to death by firing squad. His last words before he stepped in front of the guns were “Fuck, let’s do it.”

  5. Jason

    January 13, 2012 at 2:26 pm

    +1 to the ridding of Nancy Grace. She is like herpes to our society

  6. john

    March 25, 2013 at 10:51 am

    she is vindictive and evil and if that is what our media has become.. I’m not sure I blame the terrorist for attacking us.. she sucks and should be stopped..


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